Thursday, August 27, 2009

and just as I started to relax..

Hey. Today started out as a GREAT day. I took Steff to the Orthopedic DR, her knee is healing nicely ~ but still no jumping or running, to be on the safe side. He said her body has been through enough, let's give this plenty of time to heal. I really like him, I feel like he's honest and a straight shooter. SO, I asked him about the Gardasil, (we've chatted about it quite a bit & he recognizes that yes, this is an adverse reaction) I asked if these symptoms would go away in time. He said yes, they will, but you will both have the emotional scars. That dark cloud lifted, I'm telling you, my heart felt lighter all day. I have read that it would go away, but I have also read that Gardasil does not cause problems like this. SO, hearing it from someone I trust made me hear it. I smiled most of the day. THEN.......
I'm home, on the computer, of course! The phone rings, it's her coach, I don't freak out, b/c we talked earlier today. Yep, I should have freaked. It was one of the cheerleaders, Steff was having an "episode", but not as bad as before, she stated. So, I'm thinking those "quivers that go through her spine" and head up to bring her home. I walk in and she's sprawled out in the floor, face down. Coach is very good with her, talking quietly & rubbing on her.
Yeah, well, remember last nights post?? Wonder who will win? I did, by default. I called both jobs for her and had them take her off the schedule until they hear back from her. They were very understanding and I am very thankful that both managers "get it". They said very nice things about her. : ) She had to lay for a bit longer, she was very weak. Once Sara & I got her up, the walk went south. Been a while since I've seen that. (Tears!) That must be the emotional scarring he was talking about.
Long story longer, she's on the couch. Ate a good dinner, took a short nap, and is now watching a scary movie with dad. I HATE scary movies. They really scare me! ~ quite frankly, I don't get it. They love them. So, don't think I'm missing out on family time by being on this computer.
My heart got heavy again this afternoon. I had just started to relax and not worry so much about if she was going to make it through the day. Two weeks into school, and here we go. I had no choice on the jobs. Health, school, then job. Does Dave know yet? Nope. We'll chat after she goes to bed. He HAS to understand. Remember?? I'm the roller coaster - up and then down. Yep, that was my today. and life goes on. Pray for rest, rest and more rest for this child/adult of ours.
I feel like her body is telling her...no more. It just can't keep going and going. Not with what it's been through in the last year. She didn't fold backwards, she said her hip just locks up. I'll have her tell Dr. M on Monday. Perhaps with her not working, we can hit that foot detox a couple of days a week. That would be good.
I'm heading out to fold laundry! Keep Steff in your prayers ~ Love you all, me
Did I say I HATE THIS!! I HATE HER HAVING TO DEAL WITH IT!! I hate it! That said, I'm off.

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